So I’ve been to Vegas twice this year. Does this make me an expert on the town? Obviously not. But I still enjoy giving out tid bits of information that I think will help any other poor souls survive the streets of Sin City…
1. Don’t book a flight that requires you to get up at 3:15 in the morning. Especially if you don’t sleep well on planes. If you haven’t slept on a plane the last few times you’ve flown- it’s not happening this time. When I arrived in Vegas at 9:00 that morning (their time- 11:00 Chicago time) I was exhausted, but others were already there when I got in, so I was “on the go” from the first few minutes of walking into MGM (our hotel). Because of the time change, this resulted in me being up for a total of 28 hours straight. NOT recommended. It causes wrinkles. I swear.
2. If you’re already being semi-cliche by going to Vegas to do a bachelor/bachelorette (because who wouldn’t want to?), try to be original on the festivities. Enter our Katy Perry-themed night:Sure- everyone loves a good pink feather boa and condom veil (well- maybe not everyone). But we were set at a table next to another bachelorette that did that. And who had more guys come up to talk to us and offer drinks?
Imagine me and 9 other girls in my group pointing thumbs towards ourselves. THESE GIRLS!
Plus, if you do anything stupid, not one soul in that hotel is going to recognize you the next day. Not that any of us would know about this…
3. The buddy system is an awesome idea in theory. But not always easily practiced. Especially in such a huge club like the Marquee in the Cosmopoliton. One girl ended up at Planet Hollywood afterwards because she thought that’s where everyone else was heading. Two girls ended up on a service elevator and walking through the kitchen. And that must be how I ended up walking home solo on Friday night (I was fine!) and stuck sitting in front of my hotel door for who knows how long because I did not possess one of the 2 keys we had (whoopsies). Security does not like this. And it’s also very had to have a serious debate when you’re wearing a pink wig at 4:30 in the morning.
4. Red Bull is gross. As is McDonald’s breakfast. But both are a perfect way to start your morning (separately, not together) before heading to Wet Republic- a pool bar at MGM where we knew some peeps with a cabana.5. Hanging out in a cabana the entire time will deprive you of that fabulous Vegas tan you were hoping for. FAIL. However, after all this 60-degree weather Chicago is dealing me, I loved every second of chillin’ in the 90-degree shade.
6. Biggest douchebag awards will always go to the dude with Jersey Shore haircut making it rain dollar bills into the pool. So, um, don’t do that. Although a few swifty-taken chlorine-soaked dollar bills went towards my second round of McDonald’s breakfast the next day…
7. Pool toys are fun:There’s actually a story behind the masks- I’m not sure how we acquired them the year some of us lived together, but they were often broken out to scare people who were at an afterbar at our house for the first time. It was like a hazing process.
8. Dancing is fun. Dancing to live performances is even more fun:IYAZ came and hung out when we were at Vanity in the Hard Rock Hotel. Randomly awesome.
9. The perfect way to end your vacation/start your detox is gelato.After my fiasco of having to go to the airport, get my flight cancelled, and having to go back to the hotel (about half the girls were staying an extra night), I was done-zo. As was one of the others. The idea of putting any more vodka in our systems was a no-go, so we went with gelato instead.
White chocolate was a good choice.
10. Being organized is a good idea.However, we could have used about 3 or 4 entire bottles of alcohol less. Because you can’t pack them back into your bag when you’re only flying with carry-on. I guess we were just really excited. Oh well. I just wish we had saved the extra cash. So we could do something with it. Like make it rain at the pool?
Oh and here’s a freebie foodie tip for ya…
It’s not really a secret that I’m not a fan of Starbuck’s. I think it’s bitter coffee that is horrifically overpriced. And they have lackluster food (I heart you, Panera!). So on my last day, when I couldn’t do another McSkillet or McGriddle or other McCalorie-fest, I chose to try Starbuck’s “perfect oatmeal” for the first time.Yes. I totally stood with my McDonald’s coffee in the line for Starbucks. I think the girl in the logo shed a tear when I did it. And you wanna know how much they charged me for that “perfect oatmeal” in the MGM Grand hotel? $4. $4! I paid $4 for what I could have made at home for a quarter.
And I sat and ate my oatmeal that should have had gold flakes sprinkled on top. What did I think? It was ok.
But I totally make it better.